Day 2: All the Goodness
Even as well as things kicked off yesterday - SO much better than I’d imagined - I can’t say I was overjoyed at having this task in front of me yet again. It’s really like the start of anything, the entirety of the commitment is still spread out in front of me; I’m not really in it yet, so the effort is high. But, before I get to the goodness, here are some things that ran through my mind…
This is soooooo muuuuuuuuch… (me whining to myself).
Will this annoy people? Would I be annoyed by this? These daily posts about mundane goodness. Am I clogging email inboxes? What if subscribers drop? Then I remembered, that’s not the reason, nor has that ever been the reason I started this account. The answer to all of those questions might be “yes” and that is okay. Truly, I get it. We must all put boundaries around the things taking up space in our mind and our inboxes that serve us well.
Also, late yesterday, I thought — Okay, I get it. All day little “delights” (I’ve used that word, thought that word and heard that word more in the last 48 hours than in my entire life) occur, mini sweet moments you might miss if you aren’t paying attention. And that reframe is great and blah…blah…blah…but, what about the big stuff? What about creating a life we constantly have to work harder (in all ways: time, energy, money, effort…etc.) in order to support? What if that will always feel like a drag? What about the sell all the things and go off the grid idea? No answers here, just random thoughts…
However, this morning I wondered — what if the small things are the big things, what if the big things start falling in line because you have a kind of energy shift and different set of expectations and awareness and focus? What if the big things just start to take a different shape? It’s a little more woo-woo than usual for me, but I’ll call it part of the experiment.
Pause: For anyone confused who needs a little context, check out this post.
Oh, one more thing…last one, I promise. I created a new rule: no toxic positivity. Some stuff in our days is just shitty - let’s call it what it is. There will be no turning of the lemons into lemonade. If I walk out of the coffee shop and spill my entire coffee (this is an entirely possible, yet entirely made up scenario), I’m going to embrace the sucky feeling that comes next, cuss a lot, go get another coffee, and be happy about none of it. There will be a hard pass at anything resembling, “well, that moment allowed me to pause and take a breath….”
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I went for a 3 mile run this morning outside. It was early and quiet and only 62 degrees. What continues to astonish (delight) me most is that at nearly 46 years old, these two legs can still carry me strong through a couple of miles.
Laughing. A podcast episode literally made me laugh so hard I was crying and that happens far too rarely. If I was only allowed to describe one thing as delightful, I think I would choose laughter. Have you ever thought about the degree of vulnerability, and by extension courage, it takes to laugh? And also, how rare it is that we laugh — especially a hard belly laugh — by ourselves. I mean, I’ve laughed at myself, by myself, but typically another person is involved in some way. And the sharing…I think the sharing is paramount here because the infections nature and the exponential magnitude of laughter when shared is pretty phenomenal.
On a much more random note, I wrote a Christmas book for my son back in October and it been sitting gathering dust as I put off finding an illustrator (see also: creative procrastinator). On a whim, I reached out to someone yesterday. I have not even one teeny tiny assumption as to what this would cost (hundreds, thousands, many thousands…), but the progress feels energizing.
So much outside time: coffee on the deck, lunch on the deck, working on the deck…
Speaking of lunch…Revel Kitchen cilantro lime sauce. I’m never tired of it. (possibly local to STL).
Watching my dogs roll in the grass.
I’m going to call that a wrap on day 2. I’m finding this project falling into the simple, but hard category and wondering if there is ever a point where this perspective becomes one’s default.